Longest Chemo Ever

    Round 4 (of 6) was a debacle.  Debacle might be a little alarming.  How about if we go with “a big inconvenient headache.” Other than that things are going well.  A few more problems getting around but I’m still not using my cane.  You would think that all the steroids being pumped into me would turn me into the incredible Hulk but I see to be maxing out as the Michelin Man.  It’s very annoying.

    Anyway, what happened yesterday at chemo?  Well, Eric came to pick me up (Thanks Eric!) and we stopped by the Oncology Pharmacy since one cannot purchase $14K medications at Walgreens.  After all that paperwork was filled out, an on-line survey completed and my insurance and debit card very carefully scanned we wandered upstairs to the Oncology treatment area.  Everything was normal.  They put me in the chair, stabbed a needle into my Borg implant and start pumping me full of drugs.  Then they noticed me legs.  They’re always a little poufy but yesterday they were swollen and just a little red.  For some reason (^:-)^) this alarmed the nurse, and Eric and the nurse practitioner and the doctor.  Two of the medications I’m using cause blood clots.  Swelling is a symptom of blood clots.  Blood clots are bad.  
    From that point on we went into this weird time warp that often appears when involved in some kind of medical procedure.  I remember it well from the nursing home.  After about three weeks (not really) it was decided that I needed a venous Doppler (not connected to weather or radar) and the ultrasound folks at Audubon Hospital would take care of that for me now.  Whenever the oncologist says the word “hospital” I get a little nervous.  In conjunction with the verb “GO” I ramp up to a cold sweat and head for my happy place.  There are rainbows.  OK.  Trying to stay focused.
    
    When my hearing came back on and I started paying attention again I discovered that we had some down time before the ultrasound  so we took a break for a very late lunch and a quick trip to my place for a costume change since I’d probably need to change a few times doing the procedure.   Then back to the hospital.

    First registration (just like admission, I'm still not figuring it out) and then getting lost in the bowels of the hospital (all the offices were closed or closing); being rescued by a hospital staff person and ushered into an office with a promising sign and turned over to another staff member.  It was the wrong office.  Our party also grew by one after we ran into another Doppler person wandering the hall looking for ultrasound as well.  We now had a big enough group for a Dungeons and Dragons adventure.  I wanted dice and my spell book.
    
    Finally, staff member #2 found the office, ushered us down there and we signed in, sat down, and waited.  I was being “worked in” to the schedule.  There was TV watching, people watching, a lot of coming and going, apologies from staff for the wait, snacks.  Michael arrived (without getting lost) and we waited a little more.  I was the last person seen.

    If you’ve never had a waist down ultrasound that traces your primary leg veins I’m here to tell you that there is a lot of sound conducting gel involved and guess where your femoral veins exit your abdominal cavity.  I’m just not going to say anymore about that.

    I don’t have any blood clots in either leg.  Trust me.  They looked everywhere.  The tech called the doctor and the doctor said I could go home.  Finally It dawned that the plan had been to keep me at the hospital if they found a clot.  I had overheard another patient saying that on their cell phone and, while it did make a certain amount of sense, I was not going there.  Literally.  Come on.  I wasn't even packed. 

    Thankfully, it all turned out OK and no hospitalization.  They set me loose.  Eric and Michael were anxiously waiting and we ran (OK shambled but it was fast) and went to Mark’s Feed Store on Bardstown Road to celebrate.  Did you know they have free desert on Monday?  Tell all your friends.  It was very nice.

    So that was the epic of the longest chemo ever.  Kate has volunteered to go with me Thursday.   I don’t anticipate a repeat of Monday’s fiasco.  Today I’m very sleepy and got a really late start.  Since we’re not buried under a foot of snow or an inch of ice I may even venture out.  Or not.  Still working on that focus thing.

    Thanks for putting up with my ramblings and being with me through this.

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[Nora]

REHAB center.